Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Revolutionize Women and S.....

I'm in the mood for a provocative topic,so excuse Wanjiru ;-)

Should women have sex like men?
To me I say... hell yeah! and why not . How many times have I heard women who are my friends, colleagues at work and other females talk of how they met this great person,dated, he is not all that but just wants to sleep with him .When they sleep with the dude and perhaps the dude just disappears and starts acting up because he could tell you were not all that into him , why do we get mad and rave like a wounded lioness in jungle of Africa? You really didn't want anything with the guy right? So why put emotions in it. Why then get pissed off when the guy takes off after hittin it?Why can't we women have sex with no feeling attached to it. Even when women knowingly and just wanted a one night stand we still put some emotions in it and hate the person afterwards if they never ever call you or snob you next time you bumped into him.


Why do men get mad or hate on women who have sex with them for pure sex ( mwenjoyo) and want nothing else? Why do the men feel disrepected and feel all too bad if you tell them that that is all you wanted after the fact:-) . Why can't women just "hit it" (Can I say that:-) and leave with no intention of hooking up again or even a phone call? Maybe the woman just wanted some good ol' times and had no intention of going back for more.

Why do men get shocked and get insulted if a woman say'it was not good? They ask how it was and then when you say the truth they get shocked by it. Eh ..why can't I say I wasn't "satisfied" and it sucked! Why then did you ask? I know it is a kind of assurance but sometimes it just sucks either because it was too small, too big ,didn't hit the right spot or the "touch was not there period!

Why is it when a woman sleeps with a guy the first time she is loose? .So what do we call the guy? . Why aren't we allowed to "test " the water before we dive in. Nobody wants to work so hard on something and then find out the end product sucks and does not deliver !

Sometimes I just wonder? mmhhh........................................

11 comments:

akiey said...

I'd say it's how we are socialized. It's unfortunate that in many societies boys are raised to think it's okay to go about having sex but the same won't/shouldn't apply to girls.

It takes a player to hook up with a playeress bcoz they both know the rules of the game. Those men/women that feel disrespected are in my opinion not in it to play. It's like playing mind games with somebody only this time the victim's emotions are being messed with.

If it's the guy's chick/wife etc he need not get shocked or annoyed bcoz just like a game of football/soccer, you win some, you lose some. If she falls short sometimes too so he shouldn't hesitate to let her know.

-They're both loose if any one of them thinks the other gave it up too easily. Just my $0.02.

Nakeel said...

Thats my gal telling it the way it is.. i like it and its the truth Nick, Blue $ Milo mmeisha wuuuiiii...
I agree with you women should also be alowed to test the water before they dive in it...

@Akiey enyewe on the point of boys are raised to think of having sex ovyo unlike the girls is true but i guess it is our time to change it not a matter of players or that...

Nakeel said...

Irena weka word verification jamani

Guessaurus said...

Hmm..good points raised there Irena! And yes, I feel you on men thinking that just because they slept with a woman on the first date she is loose. Excuse me but did she have solo sex? Where were you? You dont know her that well either, arent in a relationship with her etc, so you are as loose as she is!

Its a shame the same brush isnt used to paint casual sex in both sexes. I wish I was brave enough to go up to a guy and say, hey, wanna shag? :) but by God whenever a guy starts chatting me up, the only (Yes, ONLY) thing they are thinking about is how fast they can get me to drop my knickers. Shouldnt they be tainted as loose - and since I dont, I am considered a good gal, and they respect me!!! But if I do, i am damned to the gullows of whorishness. The blasted doublestandards!!

Same thing about cheating: The excuses used by men being they need variety, they have needs blah boo hoo blah.. all well and good.. but as women, dont we have needs too...? Hmm, yes you do but not as we men have, is the answer... I am still swallowing the bull here, up until I ask the question! If your needs are more than ours, does it mean when you cheat you do it with another man? Eh? What? Seeing as your needs as men should be matched/met by someone whose needs are the same as yours? No? You shagged another woman? Damn, did you force her to sleep with you? No? It was consensual? So, that WOMAN you slept with had needs too, right?
And I am a woman and I dont?

Milonare said...

I will have to post a blog on this. My theory is that societal expectations (thx Akiey) are that women are custodians of a treasure that men are out to get.

Let the man get the treasure too easy - you're branded loose...

Find a man who gets many treasures - he's branded a hero...

Whether this is wrong or right is a whole different ball game. However, from my limited observations, the theory above holds.

Lemme get started on that blog...

Nice Irena, nice!!

@naks
The day Nick and I isha is the day Mathare chomekas or Guess unleashes the wrong pills ;)

@Guess
We need to address this touchy issue further. Will holla when the post is out...

irena said...

Akiey: That's true about our society expectations when it comes to sex but I feel at this day and age, it is also important for women to have say on it and to have it the way they want it too.By the way, sex is therapeutical you know :-))).True too, it takes a player to know a playeress. I totally agree that men should not expect to be perfect in it and have to reassured all the time plus no one can perform miracles all the time like a well oiled machine;-)))

Nakeel: You know that's right!By the way you have just opened a can of worms, I need to know why Nick, Milo and Blue wameiisha?

Milo: He! he! ati a blog like mine, wacha hijacking.What do you mean we are custodians of the treasure .If that is the case then don't feel all too bad when we give away a treasure that belongs to you:-))
If the treasure is mine then I can choose to give a pearl to this person, a cut of diamond to the other, a silver cup to the next and nobody should have a say on my distribution right?

Gess: You know you are my gal!and what you have said is so true .By the way women have needs and wants and should have those needs fulfilled without having to go through any guilt trip..
About cheating,I dunno where to start on that.Apparently some Kyuk men believe that due to polygamous nature of the tribe in yesteryears, they are just fulfillng their tribal callin for more than one gachungwa. huh!

irena said...

Nakeel: Word Verification is on!

Blue said...

@ Nakeel- Blue Milo& Nick wameisha?

I'm with the girls on this.
I urge every woman to do exactly what they want. Have sex when how and if they want it. Enjoy to the max.That said it is true most men would fall over themselves for casual sex- with no strings attached. Why should women be any different.

I have often found that 'heat of the moment' sex is the least fulfilling- it may be momentarily satisfying but thats it! I am for a more planned encounter.

If the sex was good for both parties then it should be revisited -if it was good for one and not the other then it should not. It is perfectly in order for a woman to say she didnt enjoy herself cause it was:
a) Too big
b) Too small
c) Too Limp

As it is for the man not to enjoy himself because it was:
a)Too tight
b)Too wet
c)Too dry

I say :empower the women!- its about time.

Blue

irena said...

Blue: Ahoy!

Milonare said...

Irena
I'm not saying that you shouldn't dish out jewels as and when you please to whomever it may concern. All am saying is that society seems to expect the man to ask and the woman not to give in fwaaaa.. Accolades are then assigned to men based on their asking prowess and labels to women based on their fwaaa-ness

Hijacking with warning in advance is acceptable under blog law 98 subsection III paragraph b third sentence... ;)

irena said...

Milo: Ati what? where? who? section of which law? Don'tmake me sound like the grandma in "The diary of mad black woman":-)